Post-traumatic stress disorder??

Spoke to a friend yesterday and he criticised me for:
1) updating my chinese diary since when it is republished it is not on the top of the screen therefore he tends not to read it;
2) subsequently for not updating on current affairs;
3) and if updating on current affairs then writing about 'post-rationalised existencialist' matters (= too depressive for some perhaps??)

Hm.
I was a bit upset. But some boys don't care about girls being upset. That kind of sometimes makes me feel rather restless and when I imagine their face and their whole them I just feel like hitting them very hard so that they have at least a bit of a clue how it feels when they beat your you (you can't really get onto their insides to make them feel what they made you feel so you just feel like you need to hit the shell and hit and hit and hit).
Sad, eh?

And perhaps this aggression is somewhat of a reaction to the aftereffects of the amounts of stress we get subjected to and which I believe exams leave you with.
The exams have finished, and this fact is manifested via various means to action:
- my brain makes me be capable of switching a stove on (and put the pan on the one that's switched on rather than off) which means that I can actually eat somewhat more healthily
- I feel like actually going training and not just moaning about how I can not
- suddenly my mind is allowed to wander*
(unfortunaltelly so it seems that hitting people hard over their heads is not included thus I am made to believe it not to be generated by stress but by stupid boys)

-suddenly my mind is allowed to wander*
And I think about myself within the world in a more constructive way and the results that come out of the computer point east.
Rusty came to visit on Friday and it was wonderful, although it seems like we both need to reach for the skies for the planet is beating us down, slowly but presistently, bit by bit, cutting our wings off. And so we need to go...
Listening to the whispering whiz of the wind in empty spaces, feeling the initials of freedom being burned into our wide open anticipating hearts,...
With eyes open to the talk of our souls we have to walk on.